Coming back to Karate
A few months ago, on the 3rd of September, I took a deep breath and opened the door to 138 Lake Street, Nashua. Everything looked both deeply familiar and just a little strange, the way my hometown looks when I go back to visit now.
The first person I ran into was Mr. Somerville, whom I have known for 14 years, going back to the very first day of my highly unexpected journey from white belt to black belt. “Don’t faint,” I joked, as I saw his eyes widen. At the threshold of the training floor, I greeted Hanshi Marsh rather shyly, and watched his good manners put the kibosh on a double take. I had not set foot in the dojo since last winter. And I had dropped out of regular training many months before that.
This isn’t my first long absence from karate. In fact, over the 14 years, it’s at least my third. While I am not happy about that, maybe it’s just to be expected. For one thing, people get injured. Yes, my beloved adult students, I am looking at you! And then--well, then there’s everything else that can happen to us. As Arthur Brooks recently pointed out in The Atlantic, we tend to regard the more even-keeled seasons of our lives as normal, and the times of crisis and disruption as the exception. But this is an illusion. In fact, for most of us, getting knocked off our stride in some way is a pretty regular occurrence.
So what’s it like to come back to karate after being out for quite some while? I will not lie to you and say that it is easy, but I will also tell you truly that it is wonderful. You will feel clumsy. You will wish you remembered more. You may well be sore the next day. But you will also be uplifted by your karate family. Everyone will be glad to see you, and go out of their way to help you get back in the groove. Almost to the point of embarrassing you, but this will pass. If you keep coming, you will be woven back into the fabric of the community in short order.
But what about that voice in your head that says you’re not good enough? That you’ve been out too long? That you were never that good in the first place? That you will just be wasting everyone’s time if you waltz in and expect the instructors to work with you?
Pay no attention to that voice. I am mindful of some wise words I once heard from my younger son’s bass teacher. It is hard to learn to play the bass. If you are just starting out, chances are excellent that your fingers are bleeding, you don’t sound very good, and the list of things you need to correct seems to go on forever. But here is what Peter’s teacher had to say about all that: “We must be very hard on the work. But we must be very kind to ourselves.”
So maybe you’ve forgotten all your material. Maybe you’re not in very good physical shape. But that is what coming to class is for. Just bring yourself. Whatever the state of your karate, you are always good enough to be here.
Furthermore, there is someone in the community who needs you. You may or may not ever know who that person is. But just by showing up, you are going to reassure someone. Or challenge someone. Or make someone feel less self-conscious. Please come. You are doing something good for yourself, but probably for someone else too.
And as for finding the right moment? Clearly, our present circumstances are exceptional. In the context of COVID-19, we all have to acknowledge that our personal choices affect other people, and that sacrifices may be required. But all things being equal: the right time to come back to karate is when you miss it. If you need to drop out again, come back when you are able. Whenever that may be. I don’t know everything about what will happen when you do. But I do know that when you put your hand on the doorknob, you can expect a warm welcome inside.
Written by Katherine Philbin
